Evangelical Flips Through Book Of Revelation To Figure Out When Trump Will Be Back
DALLAS, TX—America’s evangelicals are diligently looking the scriptures to search out out when Trump will return to assert his rightful throne as America’s president. According to sources, native man Buzz Campbell is flipping via the e-book of Revelation for brand new clues as to Trump’s return.
“It’s gotta be in here somewhere!” stated Campbell stated as he frantically flipped via the pages. “Maybe Trump is one of the four living creatures? Or maybe he’s the 7-headed beast that comes out of the ocean? That would be epic.”
According to America’s Evangelical prophets, Trump is simply laying low because the wrath of Biden and his commie hoards are unleashed upon the earth. After the appointed time, Trump will return to assert his throne and clear up all of the corruption, human trafficking, and pretend information so Jesus can come again.
“We must be patient,” stated First Baptist Pastor Robert Jeffress. “The earth is groaning under the oppression of the Democrats– with their pronouns and their hatred for the 2nd Amendment. But I assure you– Trump will return and wipe away every tear.”
“Maybe it will even happen today!” Jeffress continued.
Reporters reached out to Trump for remark however have been unable to achieve him since he was having fun with the gorgeous climate on his golf course.