Flintstones Vitamins Now Available With Puberty Blockers

by akoloy



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WHIPPANY, NJ—Bayer AG, the multinational pharmaceutical company, has introduced a model new line of trans-friendly Flintstones nutritional vitamins laced with puberty-blocking hormones. To assist normalize early childhood transition, the nutritional vitamins shall be on sale over-the-counter with out restriction.

“Yes, zis seems all very ethical,” mentioned Bayer CEO Hans Von Himmler whereas stroking his pet cat-pig hybrid. “Ve simply give ze little girl-child ze hormones, and then ze beard grows. Ve always on ze right side of history.” 

Flintstones nutritional vitamins’ new girl-to-boy chewables shall be fabricated from anabolic steroids with nutritional vitamins and scrumptious fruit flavors added in. The nutritional vitamins shall be utterly natural and hormone-free– besides, in fact, for the artificial hormones that are the energetic ingredient. 

Some politicians expressed alarm on the considered giving artificial hormones to younger youngsters, however they shortly fell silent after Bayer threatened to tug marketing campaign donations and enterprise from their states.


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