Progressive Utopia: Man Eats Pancakes With Ethnically Neutral Syrup And Generic, Non-Native-American-Related Butter While Watching Washington Football Team Play
ALEXANDRIA, VA—After many years of progressive work for significant change, native man Chxd Bxrnx sat down on this new utopia to take pleasure in some carb-free pancakes with ethnically impartial maple syrup and generic, non-native American-related butter whereas watching the Washington soccer staff play.
According to sources, progressives have managed to take away all of the final vestiges of problematicness from the world. Thanks to their efforts, there aren’t any references to race, ethnicity, or gender in all of tradition.
“Man, (and womxn!), this is the life!” stated Bxrnx earlier than saying a fast prayer of lament to the Earth for robbing her of her bounty and sitting all the way down to eat. As he dug in, his menstruating life companion learn a kids’s e-book consisting completely of the letter “X” to his agender offspring, because the household just lately burned all their Dr. Seuss books. His older agender offspring sat in a close-by room taking part in with a gender-neutral potato head.
Unfortunately, Bxrnx’s stress-free afternoon was lower brief after his Amazon Alexa caught him whistling “Camptown Races” to himself, which is a problematic minstrel tune.
Authorities rapidly arrived to haul him off to the gulags for a lesson in racial sensitivity.